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Nerd Herd

By being a computer genius, drama, facebook, fashion statements, holiday fun, partying like a rock star 2 Comments


I totally meant to post some photos from Halloween, but I didn’t. I was too busy hosting a clothing swap party and working and getting ready for the 30 for 30, and I didn’t get around to fixing the red-eye in the photos in a timely manner. J and I went as members of the Nerd Herd. From Chuck. You know…that show about the spies on NBC?

Oh, right. No one watches Chuck, which is why it will probably be canceled and also why no one knew what our costumes were.

Some of my friends used to refer to J and I as the Geek Squad, so at least we could say we were in the Nerd Herd, which is kind of like the Geek Squad, but fake. Either way, I thought they were cool costumes…and inexpensive.




In other news, my mom told me a very disturbing story this afternoon, which really made me want to un-friend my brother’s ex-girlfriend from a long time ago on Facebook. Maybe I should have listened to him when he suggested that I un-friend her in the first place, but I thought he was being spiteful, and I used to enjoy reading her witty status updates. But, apparently, months ago, when they broke up she cut up his childhood teddy bear, Harry, with a pair of scissors. That’s not only psycho, but really mean and completely stupid. You don’t mess with Harry.

My usual stance on un-friending people is this: I don’t really care enough to un-friend you. But, who knows? Maybe this will launch me on an uncontrollable un-friending spree! Although, I doubt it. I’ll probably just wait for her to read this and un-friend me.

All this talk of un-friending makes me want to see the Facebook movie again, but I won’t because it’s more expensive to hit the movies on the weekends. Maybe Tuesday.

Anyway, you should know that I get highly attached to inanimate objects (such as stuffed animals, articles of clothing and CDs), so purposely trying to destroy something of sentimental value that is older than you are makes me think you should grow up and stop being an awful person or else the Nerd Herd is going to come find your ass and take a pack of kitchen matches to all of your childhood Barbie dolls.

Just sayin’.

This crazy trip has got me feelin’: nerdy
And I’m singin’ along to: A Pirate Looks At Forty – Jimmy Buffett

Six, Seven, Ate

By facebook, food, movies, new jersey, really great money-making ideas No Comments

Saw 3D? Is that for real? Seriously? I kind of feel like I’ve been trying to ignore the fact that Saw exists for, like, going on what? Six years now? Maybe I’m totally off-base for saying this because I refuse to watch it, but I don’t really see how you can justify creating seven freaking movies on the same premise in six years. Six years. Seven movies in six years. Do you see the problem here?

Saw is like the only thing I can think of that’s worse than Jersey Shore. I moved to Virginia Beach to get away from idiots like that, and now I can’t go 24 hours without overhearing some mention of fake tans and fist pumping. Where did that even come from? Fist pumping? I don’t think I ever noticed anyone fist pumping while I was living at the Jersey Shore. I do remember the lack of arm hair though. And Snooki Monster? Too bad I already picked out my Halloween costume.

You know what was a great movie? The Facebook movie. Yes, the Facebook movie. I loved it. The acting was pretty awesome, and it kind of made me think that I should have been just a tad more inspired in the early 2000s, so as to make my millions by inventing an Internet sensation (or writing seven of the same movie in six years). Also, LiveJournal made an appearance, so that’s important. (At least LiveJournal helped someone change the world, you know?)

Am I the only one that is insulted that there are going to be more Saw movies than Star Wars movies? Animated films don’t count because I said so, and don’t even get me started on those Clone Wars toys I keep getting in my Happy Meals. Every time I say, “No toy.” And every time, the McDonald’s employee on the other end of the drive-through speaker hears, “Boy,” and I end up with yet another Clone Wars collectible. (Although, they switched to Mr. Potato Head trick-or-treat buckets this week, so things are looking up.)

Happy Meals are proof that you can buy happiness. Seriously. It says it right on the menu. Happy Meal. Personally, I always order the Mighty Kids Meal with a six-piece, fries and a Diet Coke. That’s a total of about 11 Weight Watchers POINTS, and it’s the only way to order a six-piece McNuggets anymore. You can get a four-piece from the Value Menu, or a 10-piece meal, but seriously? Who the f- needs to be eating 10 nuggets? That’s gross.

Anyway, I wanted to get a Happy Meal for lunch today, but I didn’t because I had one yesterday. I went to Wawa and got a sandwich instead. Coincidentally, I was supposed to eat Wawa yesterday on the way to Busch Gardens, but we got lost looking for one in Williamsburg when we exited the Interstate. Williamsburg is really pretty because, you know, their street signs are all extremely aesthetically pleasing and blend in with the landscape (which means they’re practically non-existent). Hence, we got lost following the signs to Wawa, since there weren’t really any eye-catching signs. There’s not much that’s aesthetically pleasing about golden arches, but we saw them, therefore we had McDonald’s for lunch.

And that’s all I’ve got for today.

This crazy trip has got me feelin’: full
And I’m singin’ along to: Lisztomania – Phoenix

Poke Off

By being a computer genius, breaking news, facebook, technological enigmas 3 Comments

Whether you like it or not, Facebook has launched its application platform – enabling idiots all over the world to create stupid shit for more idiots all over the world to add to their Facebook profiles.

Personally, I’ve never been a big Facebook user, but I decided to pop in and check out the new feature. Two words – complete mayhem. You know I don’t like stupid people, so you can imagine my feeling of utter glee that there are now discussion boards where people exchange views on intellectually stimulating topics such as these:

From the X Me Application Reviews
1. “in my box it says ‘Hug You’ and i want it to say ‘Hug Me’ how do i do that?!?”

2. It says, “Hug You,” because you are signed in as yourself. To everyone else, it will say, “Hug Her,” just like the poke button says, “Poke Her.”

From the PopSugar 100 Application Discussion Board
1. it would be a lot better if you could organize the list of celebrities you had once you added them all so you can change who you want to be first and whatnot..instead i have to add them in order which is kind of difficult

2. Yeah, I’d prefer it if my celebs were in the same order as they are on my teamsugar page. It’s a little random for me as it’s linked to the celebs I already chose on sugar.

From the Catbook Application Discussion Board
1. Baka got a human friend (Dave). When he got Dave as a friend, Baka also instantly became Catbook friends with Dave’s cat, even though the two cats have never met. Why? Can cats remove friends?

2. on the same vein, why can’t my cat be friends with other cats? I have to be friends with the owners of those cats before my cat can be friends with their cat. I dont’ want all those human friends; just the kitty friends!

3. Is there a way for me to add people to the Family section? Obviously, I am my cats’ family, but so is my husband. We shouldn’t have to both have separate catbook profiles for our cats. And the cats shouldn’t just be his friend.

What the hell is all this crap? The only good I see coming out of this is the iLike application, currently growing at a rate of 200,000 new users per day, finally bringing a soundtrack to the Facebook experience. 

Final thoughts? Count me out. I consider myself pretty Internet-savvy, but this is a little too much freedom for me – my head is spinning.