cool things i found on the internet

Hurricane Preparedness

By | cool things i found on the internet, hazards to my well-being, hurricane preparedness, life's a beach, time and luck, weather | No Comments

I really only have two plans for this Hurricane Irma.

Plan A: Stay dry and don’t get injured.

Plan B: I’ll be on my roof upstairs balcony in a shark costume, sporting adult swimmies (for extra safety), and carrying a light-up trident (to command the seas). Because I’m pretty sure if given the choice between rescuing an average-looking blonde girl in a flamingo skirt or a shark wearing swimmies holding King Neptune’s spear shining like a beacon of hope in the howling wind, torrential rains, and rising water…you’re coming for the shark every time.

Disclaimer (for those of you with no sense of humor): My actual hurricane preparedness purchases included a vintage-inspired AM/FM radio, a spare battery for my 80s-style floating flashlight from Hurricane Matthew, a full tank of gas, and some water. If you need me before Sunday, I’ll be hiding in a corner, studying for the ham radio exam.

Rainy Day Data

By | at the office, being a computer genius, cool things i found on the internet, employment, how did i just realize this?, salesforce, you might learn something | No Comments

I was supposed to go to New Jersey this weekend. Had my bags packed and everything. But then my car kept acting up, and the weather forecast looked pretty unfortunate, so when my alarm went off at 5:30 yesterday morning, I made the groggy decision to just sleep for two more hours and go to work instead of drive up there.

I’m glad I did work yesterday because I had a call with a prospective new client at 9:30, signed a contract to do some work for them at 10am, and was finished with the entire project and ready to invoice it by the end of the day. It was kind of a Salesforce project, but it was mostly a data cleansing and augmentation project. I find myself working on a lot of those lately.

I think I always had an affinity for data. It started out as an obsession with grammar and categorizing things into lists in my journals and diaries when I was younger. It evolved into immaculate file-naming conventions in college and impeccable folder structures, which were admired by everyone in my office at my first “real job.” It’s the reason I created such silly categories (then tags) for this blog. When TranSystems implemented a CRM system, I became vigilant about always using the system as the source of truth. And when my last company decided to overhaul their internal communication and multiple applications with Salesforce,  integrating it with their back-end system, I volunteered to lead the project because I couldn’t imagine anyone being able to get a handle on that company’s data (and processes) better than I could.

I never really knew the proper way to clean up a massive amount of data. Every time I’ve done it (until yesterday), I’ve done it in Excel, Google Sheets and/or Smartsheet, but I’ve always known that wasn’t the “right” way to do it. Last time a client asked me to take the lead on a big data migration, I chickened out and deferred to another consultant because I wasn’t confident enough in my strategy for doing it. That other consultant screwed it up royally, and I felt terrible for making that recommendation, which is why I did commit to helping them clean it all up.

It’s also why I spent this rainy day at work mastering my new favorite free thing I found on the Internet: OpenRefine. I cleaned up about a half a million pieces of data in three hours today. It sounds super nerdy, but I was pretty excited about it. 🙂

Speaking of work, today marks one year of me not having a “real job” anymore. And while that means I work excessively and haven’t had a real paycheck in 365 days…it also means I’ve spent an entire year not wasting a single minute wondering what I could be doing instead of my job. And that feels pretty amazing. 🙂

I’ve learned a lot about time, money, success, happiness, and work over the last year. Maybe I’ll write about that next.

On Repeat: Lana Del Rey

By | cool things i found on the internet, music, you might learn something | No Comments

Yesterday, I happened to catch episode 4 of Music’s Cool w/Chilly Gonzales on Beats 1.(Yes, I chose Apple Music over Spotify, and I love it.) As a former oboe player who spent hours upon hours playing, practicing, and studying music during high school and college (including two summers at band camp), I was immediately taken with this intricate dive into the music of Lana Del Ray. I especially enjoyed the comparisons and similarities drawn between her melodies and other popular music throughout history. Can’t wait to catch up on the first three episodes Music’s Cool, and listen to the next few through the end of the year!

Daily Survey #3

By | art, at the office, being a computer genius, cool things i found on the internet, lists, salesforce | One Comment

Goal: Blog more.

Strategy: Daily survey.


Coffees consumed: 2.5

Gluten-filled items consumed: 0

Dumbest thing I did today: Dropped my phone and shattered the shit out of it. Again.

Interesting thing I found on the internet: Famous quotes, the way a woman would have to say them during a meeting. I avoid this at all costs, but I still do it sometimes.

Interesting thing I found not on the internet: Flowerbox = delicious cocktail.

Scariest thing I did today: Gave someone advice about their future.

Something I learned today: Taking the blame is a good thing.

Did anyone ask when I was going to have kids, get married or move in w/boyfriend today? No!

Assembly + Enlight of the day:


Something I accomplished: Team began deploying change sets into production for 18-month-old quoting in Salesforce project.

Song of the day: I’ve Set Sail, Toh Kay

So, yeah.

Daily Survey #2

By | at the office, being a computer genius, cool things i found on the internet, food, lists, salesforce | No Comments

Goal: Blog more.

Strategy: Daily survey.


Coffees consumed: 2

Gluten-filled items consumed: 0

Dumbest thing I did today: Talked too little at lunch. Talked too much at dinner. #sociallyawkward

Interesting thing I found on the internet: Elizabeth Holmes Discusses Theranos at WSJDLive 2015. Someone asked me if I thought she avoided answering the questions or if she was being really defensive. Not having read the article they’re referring to, my intitial thought is no, I do not think either one of those things. I got the impression she made a bunch of statements she had prepared ahead of time, was a little nervous being on camera, and had difficulty dumbing down all her technical jargon for the interviewer or the average viewer to understand.

Interesting thing I found not on the internet: Hamilton Perkins Collection. (Yes, this is a website, but I saw the products in real life and met the owner in person, so this counts as “not on the internet.”) Also, a random abandoned cake on the boardwalk.


Scariest thing I did today: Networking event. #socialanxiety

Something I learned today: You can not deploy Salesforce managed package permissions granted via permission set in a change set. You have to either load them in from a file after you deploy or re-create them manually.

Did anyone ask when I was going to have kids, get married or move in w/boyfriend today? Yes.

Assembly of the day:


Something I accomplished: Met about 10 new people. 🙂

Song of the day: I Think UR a Contra, Vampire Weekend

To be continued.