Stupid things I’ve already said at work today:

Me: “Here, I got this bill in the mail and I didn’t know what to do with it. Well, Tammy said to give it to you and have you sign it and give it to her. I don’t know why I just said I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with it. I’m supposed to give it to you. Here.”

Co-worker: “I’ll bring it over to you. Where do you sit now?”
Me: “Over around there behind that around that corner. Near that big printer that prints things.”

Co-worker: “What do you need?”
Me: “Oh. Oh, nothing. I’m just standing around wasting time waiting for Kim to get off the phone.”
Co-worker: “Oh, usually when people stand there they need maps. I keep maps on that shelf”
Me: “Nope. I was just reading this stamp.”